« Home | On Being Bipolar » | Setting Priorities » | Poetry's First Line » | Now I Know » | Introducing: The Naive Sexpert » | I Just Have One Question.... » | A Miscellaneous Mind Dump - Is It Just Me? » | Censorship in India » | Strange Searches That Found Me » | A Different Kind Of Art »

Dr. Evy's First Session


Dr. "Evy" Evydense
The uninformed sexpert


My motto: "My guess is as good as yours."

Office Hours: Saturdays, 8-10 AM




Well, business is cetainly off to a slow start. Come on, kiddies, send your letters in to Dr. E. willya? I'm not gonna stick around Dodge too long if y'all already know how to make babies and stuff.

There is only one question to deal with this week, and it comes from Mackey.

Q:"O.K. Dr.Evy...here is a question for ya-
I've heard people say that what a man eats can influence the taste of his semen. Is this really true
?"

A: There are certainly enough urban myths floating around that would have you believe that, aren't there? Let me put them to bed right now. NO, what a man eats does NOT influence the taste of his semen.

A person's nationality and heritage certainly do, however. A black dude, for instance, tastes like chocolate even though, believe it or not, his squirty dick-snot stuff is white just like everyone else's. Go figger, eh? I bet that really pisses off the NAACP. This might explain why there is a delicacy in the southern States called white gravy. It became a delicacy during the days of plantations, and is still used to this day. Tastes like shit though, like you just threw up in your own mouth.

But I digress. You asked about the taste of go-go juice, not shit. There are many other documented examples. A Mexican tastes greasy, a Newfie tastes like fish (fish has a lot to do with girlie sex too). A chink-guy will leave a distinct banana after-taste. Be careful with them, because there are so many of those little suckers that...oh no, wait a minute, you're the sucker, not them. Sorry.

But I digress. You asked about the taste of baby juice. In Scotland, interesting enough, it has evolved into a sheepish flavour, but that's only because the shepherds get awfully bored during those long, lonely days. A little cross-breeding I'm told. It's true! Just ask Dolly. Remember her? Did you know that Dolly Parton always sleeps on her back?

But I digress. A warning here. If you find that there's a bit of a nutty taste, you're chewing on the wrong part of the organ, sweetie. Move upstairs a bit.

But I digress, you asked about mantube-lubricant. If you heard this old wives tale from a guy, do NOT ever shake hands with him. You know he's got to be a puller. Otherwise, how would he know? And if it was a she-beast, well you know you can just ignore that. Women are always trying to mess with your head, male or female.

But I digress. If you don't like the flavour of your dude-for-the-night you can always disguise it by using flavoured condoms. Be careful, though. Some condoms come with a time share option, which I don't recommend. Unless it's with the same woman maybe.

That'll be 5 cents please.

Now, the rest of you. Ask that question. You know you w-a-a-a-a-a-nt to. Do it. Now. While you think of it.

PEACE.



"A black dude tastes like chocolate??"
" Dick snot"???
LMAO!!!!!
You have quite the way with words Doc:)
So my hubby the trucker should taste like??????????

Ummmm....

Rubber...16 times normal strength.

Wow, the most informative shit I have ever read... Thanks, now I will begin my adventure to test all these theories. Should be a good time...

AHHHHHHHH MYY GAAAAAWDDDDDDD!!! Oh I peeeeeeed my pants - ohhhhhh I still am - damnitall I am always late - but this was flippin histerical!!!! Bahaaaaaaa!!!

Post a Comment

Links to this post

Create a Link


  • I'm Evydense
  • From Edmonton, Alberta, Canada
  • And I'm tired of living in the shadow of narrow-mindedness and ignorance. So here's the fax, Jack! "The Bible contains six admonishments to homosexuals and three hundred and sixty-two admonishments to heterosexuals. That doesn't mean that God doesn't love heterosexuals. It's just that they need more supervision." - Lynne Lavner*** I'm confused; curious; satisfied; realistically resigned to being a frustrated idealist; usually at peace with myself, but not always. Amazed at how little I know, and wondering how much I need to understand.
More of Me