Our (your) Constitution says that every man is entitled to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. Any person who spends his life running a race that he is bound to lose is really "out of it." This is, however, the case of those who pursuse happiness. It never seems to yield to a directional attack. The happiest people are those who are doing what they like to do and doing it in their possible best manner. Hapiness is not a goal,it's a by-product.What do you realy like to do? What brings you the greatest fulfillment. If these are the things that take up your time you are probably happy.



My Mom was Chrismas Mom. She'd start planning next Christmas on Dec.26. She'd look for bargins in the stores,knit whatever new decorations (or gifts), had all her shopping done by July, and it often seemed that an exra string of lights made it into the outside display wih alarming frequency.

I have three older brothers and one older sister and all are married (one just celebrated his 63rd!), so of course they have their side of the family to spend the festvites with too.

This particular Christmas (1974), Mom had gone all out and made it extra special, because she was afraid it might be our last together as a famly, given how far we getting from each other.

I'm sure as a bit of foreswhadowinng here, esp. if you read my blog of a couple entries ago,

It became a death watch, I had never observed death before, and I'll be writing or on that later if I should remember. To watch this virle, earthy, functioning as a heathy human behind the energy of this robust man, and compare that to the end of gutless accumulation become a shriveled, 65-pound-ofbones. I didn't understand.

I had left to go back to Montreal to resume work, and the call came 2 days later that I better get home on the next available, flight, which I did.

As is usual in such settings, people spoke in whispers as if the corpse is going to happen to hear anyway.

Mom grabbed me at the door and said "you can't let them take me home. I'd never forgive myself if I wasn't here when he pased." I told her I was staying the night (new plan ----I hadn't planned to!)

Here's the art I've been working on too. Somtimes I find it quiet reflection, upliftingly inspirational, sometimes I find it crushingly defeating, devastating sad; these are the ones I'm working at "defeating".

I walked over to my Dad, who hadn't recognized anyone in a month, not even Mom. I took his hand in mine, and said," I't's Rick Dad, Im the last one here."

I leaned over and kissed hm on the forehead, and then he took his last breath.

After all the suffering and the pain....it was so peaceful.


It's the only time I ever remember giving my Dad a kiss.

And he took his last breath....so calmling.......so 0eacefully.






PEACE

P.S. If you're interested in a little bit of information that has been published concerning, try http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=1009886


(don't ask me why the link doesn't highlght! I believe my computer is slowly fading away, since it's records keys I don't strike, and vice versa)

Posted by Evydense on Monday, November 06, 2006 at 9:11 a.m. | Permalink